If I could, I would shave it

Posted: October 6, 2012 in Family, Personal

This morning, yet again, we were late for something because my daughter will not brush her hair. If you have seen the pics I have posted here, you can see how long it is. It is very fine and tangles easily. It’s not that she likes her hair looking like a rats nest. It is more due to the fact that it hurts. Even the lightest touch of a brush hurts her and every single time anyone brushes her hair she cries because of the pain. I know I exaggerate a lot but I am not exaggerating regarding this. She cries every single time without fail.

I have tried every kind of conditioner, manufactured and homemade, chemical and organic. The only thing that works at all is Paul Mitchell’s The Conditioner. Except both my daughter and I are allergic to something in it. And when my daughter’s allergies are triggered so is her asthma. I have consedered writing the manufacturers and begging them to make an unscented version.

In the meantime every time I have to brush her hair I break into a sweat. And I have to add about a half an hour into our schedule to deal with it. I have tried to encourage her to cut off a few inches but it is very difficult to convince her. My ex and his mother who control every aspect of her life let her keep it long and unmanageable. I wouldnt really shave her hair but I would make her do it herself because she knows “how”. She has simply never been given the responsibility. I think if she did it herself she could control the pain better, because I can’t tell how gentle to be. I try but it is always too much for her.

Her grandmother brushes her 2 or 3 times a day for her. And she is not gentle. When she puts her hair into a ponytail, she will use a comb to make the part. She digs into my daughter’s head so hard with the comb that she frequently leaves a bloody little furrow. They have had her the majority of the time since the divorce in early 2007, since my ex stole her from me. I have so little time and so little input. I cannot begin to express how frustrating the situation is. She is 9 and a half and she cannot brush her own hair. At this rate by the time she starts high school she won’t be able to wipe her own ass without help. I know my ex, who is in his 40’s, certainly can’t.

  1. I remember those days – I asked my mom to cut my hair off, and she did. She had short hair herself so meh! Yes I looked like a boy until I grew boobs. Oops.
    Hubby has hair longer than his arms now, and another friend who has hair even longer recomended this: the tangle teezer http://www.shopwiki.com/l/Tangle-Teezer-Professional-Detangling-Hair-Brush-Compact
    Don’t know where you’d get it over there, but he likes it. I use it now and again as I can’t be bothered to brush my hair on the weekends and end up with a ball-knot at the nape of my neck that is…deadly. It does work…

    Can’t fix the ex-issue, sorry 🙂

    • drangedinaz says:

      Thanks, I will try it out. When I was a kid, I refused to brush my hair too but my Mom was a no nonsense kind of woman. She told me that if I didn’t take care of it she would stick a bowl on my head to cut it off (we were pretty poor and taking me to a salon probably wasn’t an option). Well, I didn’t believe her but I should have….she ended up cutting it off using a bowl as her guide. Needless to say, I never ever let my hair get messy again.

  2. I have two boys. That’s the only contribution I have right now. Sorry.

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