Mommy is just plain tired

Posted: May 13, 2012 in Personal, Women's Issues

My day is almost over.  I spent the entire morning doing a yard sale and did not sell more than a couple of things.  Now I will spend the next week trying to trash, donate or give away these things.  Afterward I took my daughter out to eat a big lunch, then a brief nap, and my son came home.  I put him down for a nap while my daughter and I swam.  While swimming I would periodically get out of the pool and pick weeds out of the yard and try to spray and kill ants that seemed to be swarming for some reason.

My son woke up just as I was coming in and he did not get near enough sleep.  I spent the afternoon with him and my daughter just hanging out.  Then as dinner time approached I had a battle royale with my daughter in order to get her to take a shower.  Then cooked them both dinner and called my two Mom’s while doing so.  Of course my son didn’t want to eat his food, he only wanted  my daughter’s food, which he would turn his nose up to  on any other day.  Then I gave the baby a bath and fought with him to go to sleep. Then it was my daughter’s turn….she is still not asleep although she really needs to be.

Instead, she will come out of her room repeatedly while I am trying to watch Game of Thrones.  The one hour in the entire week that I get to watch what I want supposedly without interruption.  It is the ONLY tv show I care about and she interrupts me repeatedly when she knows she should be asleep.  I’m  gritting my teeth right now in anticipation of her entrance.

Oh, and I forgot, I have to push out a new version of an application at work tonight too.  I am debating whether I should attempt it during Game of Thrones or afterward.  And as tired and irritable as I am right now, as I was rocking and singing my son to sleep I thought of how I will never have another baby to hold like that.  It made me so incredibly sad.  You moms know that feeling, right?  When they are so relaxed as to be boneless against our chest, their head on your  shoulder…the weight of them, the feel of their soft little hands and the smell of their freshly washed hair, the feel of their well worn PJ’s, and the sound of their breathing. And all of that description is wholly inadequate to express how it feels to hold your baby close.

I  am so thankful that I was able to have kids, although both were a near run thing.  No matter how much I may occasionally complain, I never want to be without them.  And someday, I may actually have grandchildren to hold.  I honestly can’t wait.

Happy Mother’s Day


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