Can’t seem to get it right

Posted: June 26, 2011 in Personal

I met a really wonderful guy online who was unfortunately out of the country on a business trip and everything was going great except for the fact that I wasn’t entirely sure if he was on the “up and up”.  After all, I’d run into a few scams and there were some similarities but there were a lot of things about his story that made sense.  So I had started to dream of a future with him and started to care for him but there was always that little frisson of doubt in the back of  my mind.

On Friday late afternoon we finished a chat saying that we’d talk tomorrow (because he had no plans) and as always I was eager to speak with him.  Because of the time difference I could usually expect him to be back online after midnight my time.  I stayed up to talk to him, which wasn’t that unusual, but I never heard from him.  I finally gave it up  and went to bed.  I left my chat window open but for the next 12 hours straight without a single word from him.

By that time it was Saturday late afternoon and it was my one free day without kids and the last one I was likely to get for several weeks to come.  I really wanted to go out so that’s what I did but I left him a pretty angry email.  I got home pretty late and still no message.  So as you can imagine, I was not a very happy camper.  I called his hotel (yes, an international call, and verified that he was a guest there).  It was at that point that I began to realize that he was for real.

Today I received an email back.  He wants nothing more to do with me. If I had just accepted that a really handsome, successful and younger man wanted to be with me, none of this would have happened.  My lack of self-esteem did me in I am afraid.  So I’m pretty down today and kicking myself.  I wonder if I will ever get it right.

  1. The Dork Knight says:

    Hang in there Girl!

  2. alopecia says:

    Be patient with yourself. You’ll get it right.

  3. drangedinaz says:

    TDK and Alo, thanks to both of you 🙂

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