Shoe is on the other foot

I’m sure you remember back in the Fall of 2010 all those angry constituents at town hall meetings disrupting the events in order to register their unhappiness with Healthcare reform being considered by Congress.   In almost every case the targeted politicians were Democrats who supported the reform.

Now it seems that Republican politicians in Arizona are facing a similar backlash but this time citizens are riled up about the recently proposed elimination of Medicare called the Ryan Plan.  I don’t want to spend time on the details of the plan.  I think it’s much more important to realize that the politics of fear is fueling constituent outrage.

Medicare is obviously a program that affects seniors the most and Arizona has a larger than average share of seniors in its population.  In fact some studies project that Arizona will have the 13th highest proportion of elderly residents in the U.S. by 2025.  Population studies have found that people retire in and to Arizona earlier than other seniors in other states, typically at age 55 instead of 65.  Seniors migrate here for a variety of reasons:  climate, lifestyle (whatever the hell that means), or dependency issues.  This last one is important.  Dependency issues means that a senior is motivated to move closer to family because they need assistance.  Medicare would affect those with dependency issues to an even greater degree than seniors motivated by a desire to begin a new life in a new climate.

According to the last comprehensive study done back in 2002*, retired seniors accounted for about 23% of all spending in the state of Arizona.  With the oncoming wave of Baby Boomer retirees, migration to Arizona is expected to increase, which overall is considered a positive thing for the state of Arizona.   According to the 2002 study, the net gain of income for seniors migrating into the state was over one and a half billion and the market most affected by it has been the housing market (of course).

Right now houses are dirt cheap in Arizona and it appears that housing prices will continue to go down if my predictions of a double dip prove correct, which even CNN is now saying will occur.**  Unfortunately while housing prices might be historically low for migrating seniors, their individual worth is also historically low.  Many will have houses to sell in their current states before they can move.  Many of them will have been affected by the recent recession and will have lost considerable sums in any stock based retirement accounts.  So it’s unclear how this will all affect the senior migration rate to the state of Arizona and thus the state’s economy.

One thing is for sure, those seniors who are already here have historically had and will continue to have considerable political clout.  This politically active social strata has been a prime target of ads seeking to scare Seniors about their future.  What’s so strange about the current kerfuffle is that many of the Baby Boomers seen at town halls railing against the Ryan Plan won’t actually be affected by it.  The plan actually wouldn’t kick in until 2022 and as a result will affect someone who is currently in their 40′s but not those who are already retired or close to retirement now.

It would be nice to think that the Baby Boomers are out there protesting on behalf of my generation but I have no illusions on that score.  This is the same generation that is so darn scared of the “Muslim Kenyan usurper in the White House” and doesn’t want to pay for the healthcare or welfare of the supposed slackers in this country.  So I know they’re out there bitching because they’re afraid that their benefits will be taken away and they don’t, generally speaking, give a hoot about my benefits 20 years down the road.

All that being said, I am still enjoying seeing the two freshmen Republican Reps. Paul Gosar and David Schweikert face the music on the Medicare issue.  Ultimately, the message remains valid, regardless of the motives of the messenger.  Keep on keeping on Arizona GOP….you’re doing great!

Sources:

* http://www.azcommerce.com/doclib/prop/sesreports/Retirement.pdf

**http://money.cnn.com/2011/05/31/real_estate/march_home_prices/index.htm?hpt=T1

http://www.azcentral.com/news/articles/2011/05/31/20110531az-medicare.html

Theirs not to question why……

Today is Memorial Day.  My family has had soldiers fight in every war the U.S. has ever been engaged in starting with the Revolutionary War.  From what I’ve been told by family genealogists, apparently we  had someone with the surname Craig (on my mother’s side) who fought for the Colonials and died.  His own wife took up his gun and carried on with the fight.  It makes me proud to think that the women in my family didn’t just sit home and wait for an outcome but took up arms themselves when the need arose.  Waiting for disaster I don’t understand–taking the field of battle I can comprehend.

Not to say that I glorify war. I don’t.  I’ve spent part of the last 27 years discovering little by little the history of my ancestors in the Civil War.  And during that fact-finding journey have come face to face with the true horror of war.  It is ugly, loud, smelly, dirty and foul.  It is terrifying, heartbreaking and often pointless.  War is a plague upon human kind that we inflict upon ourselves.  We are our own disease.

And even thinking so, I can still appreciate the amount of bravery it took for my ancestors to face the enemy on a field of battle.  It is far too easy for those of us in our modern “La-Z-Boys” to second guess what and why they did what they did. Truth is, until you’ve “seen the elephant”, you don’t know jack.  I pray that I never have to face such a situation and that my children never have to either.

So here’s a toast to the the soldiers of the present and the past in my family that faced down their fear and did what they thought was right.  And here’s a toast to all of America’s soldiers past and present who love their country to such a degree as to sacrifice their own welfare to ensure their country’s continued well-being.

Slainte!

Breaking up is hard to do even when you want to

I’ve almost always been the dumper, not the dumpee. I can only think of one time where I was dumped, when I was about 30 years old. It was a horrible experience and though I cared little for the guy it still affected my self-esteem.

Additionally, if you count all the times when I liked someone in that special way and they did not return the feeling….then I’ve suffered a lot of rejection. So I know what it feels like to have someone say, “I don’t like you, want you or love you.” Sometimes it’s followed with the very important word “anymore”. Sometimes it’s “I [never] liked you, wanted you…..” Suffice it to say, I know how it feels and I know it sucks.

I don’t have any sense of pride when I say that I have mostly been the one doing the dumping because I see those relationships as failures. They’re always failures because I have let a relationship go too far even when I had serious reservations. I don’t know why I make excuses for their behavior except to recognize that I rush into things and then am too afraid to back out of them in a timely fashion. The person who suffers the most is the dumpee and I take full responsibility for my own cowardice.

The reason that this is on my mind is because this weekend my husband moved most of his stuff out of my house. Not all of it, but enough that the finality of things would be clear even to the blind, deaf and dumb. We went through that awful process of sorting, claiming and packing stuff. No, those are my steak knives but this is your collander. Or that’s my ladder, not yours. The gray pans are yours, the black pans mine…..It’s amazing how, in just a couple of years, two people’s things can become almost irretrievably mixed up. I have learned to let some things go….so what if he takes one of the couches that breaks up the living room set. And it’s not just letting go of stuff, it’s letting go of long standing arguments. We haven’t fought in weeks because I no longer care enough to argue. The opposite of Love isn’t Hate, it’s Apathy.

For over a year now I was angry at my husband for disguising who he was deep inside and angry at myself for refusing to see what should have been obvious. This turning point in our lives has relieved me of those feelings. I’ve done what I thought was right to correct the mistake and it’s a great relief to me. It’s as if a burden has been lifted. I feel like I can focus on my children and on myself in a way that I couldn’t before. The future seems more open to me–more possible paths to take and few limitations on my choices. I can’t describe it any better than that. I will face other challenges now though. On those really long days when work and children get overwhelming, I won’t be able to turn to him and say, “you take over now, I am going to sleep”. I will have to be there, by myself, 24/7.

I’ve started the paperwork to file and we’re at the point where I will need to give him a copy. I can tell it is hurting him but it’s the only way forward and through this mess. The Court will help establish boundaries and lend authority to them that my insistent nagging has not accomplished. It will guarantee us both rights to our son and protect us from encroachments by each other. As it should be. But it’s still a cold and ugly process. When people get married it doesn’t feel like a business negotiation but when they get divorced, when they “dissolve their union” it sure as hell becomes a mercenary process.

I should be a divorce attorney I have had so much practice with it. I’m an expert at ending things. I’m horrible at making them last….at least I think its me. Truth is, I don’t really know if its me. Maybe I never will. I’ve always married for the wrong reasons to decent men. I never had the kind of clarity that I do now. Is that my fault?  I’ve had so little guidance from my parents…they were bad examples and even when sought for advice, I received little or nothing of use.

I’ve never had the chance to marry the right man for the right reasons. And perhaps I never will. I’m finally okay with that possibility. I’m okay with the possibility of being alone for the rest of my life. It certainly is easier in many respects. And it’s just taken me 41 years on this planet to get to that point. Why others get there faster than me, I can only speculate.

In light of all the changes going on in our lives, one thing that has not changed is the joy I get from having our son. Liam is now 8 months old and the happiest baby I have ever seen. Without my husband coming into my life when he did, I would not have had Liam. I believe that it was worth it to bring such a wonderful little person into the world. While I have withdrawn my own love and affection from my husband, he will always have the unconditional love for Liam and I know he appreciates it as much as I do.  Even though we’re going through this difficult time, regardless of who said or did what to whom, I hope that we’ll come through the other side saying, “it was worth it for Liam alone”.

Fickle is as Fickle does

There is nothing constant in this world but inconsistency.
–Jonathan Swift

Does Gov. Brewer have multiple personalities? The reason I am asking is because I can’t see a guiding principle behind her recent actions. To date she has spent millions defending the indefensible and unconstitutional anti-immigration law SB1070. On April 23, 2010 the same day Gov. Brewer signed the law she said:

“another tool for our state to use as we work to solve a crisis we did not create and the federal government has refused to fix …”

From this and many other statements, it appears that Gov. Brewer is not willing to consult nor willing to wait on the Federal Government on a vital issue that has always been the purview of the Feds, border security and immigration.

However, on other issues that have traditionally been the purview of both the states and the Feds she is more than happy to use the tools that the Federal Government supplies, imperfect though they may be. For example, she has eagerly supported the State in defense of the Employer Sanctions Law. Arizona businesses and business advocates sued the state in Federal Court because they felt the state’s requirement of making businesses use the Federal E-Verify program to verify the citizenship of those they hire was too burdensome because of problems with the system and the difficulty in complying for small businesses.*

Likewise, she announced today that she has ordered the State Attorney General to get a Federal Court ruling on whether or not Arizona could implement the popularly mandated medical marijuana law. Arizona is the 15th state to approve medical marijuana but she intends to run to Daddy and ask permission if we can do it. But when it comes to implementing laws that she and her ilk want to see in place, then she is Little Miss Contrary.

I’m not so much arguing for or against any of these laws in particular**, but what I am annoyed about is her inconsistency. Like so many in the GOP, they’re all for Liberty and Small Government EXCEPT on social issues like abortion, like medical marijuana, like gay marriage, etc. That’s when government can get all up in your uterus….um, I mean, personal business. So which of the following is behind Gov. Brewer’s decisions lately?

1. multiple personality disorder
2. typical GOP flip-flop on security v. social issues
3. political disingenuous appeal to her base while trying to also quell negative reaction from those in the middle
4. a lack of character signified by fickle decision making based on too loosely held principles
5. All of the above

Notes:
*SCOTUS ruling yesterday effectively said that the law was not too burdensome on businesses and did not step on the toes of the Federal responsibility for Immigration

**But since I’m pretty progressive, you can guess where I stand on these issues.

NUNYA….

So I’m standing in line at the deli counter at a local Albertson’s to take advantage of a terrific coupon deal when I get behind one of those women who feel the need  to share every pathetic detail of their miserable lives with a complete stranger. You know EXACTLY who I’m talking about.  She is not old….middle aged is the typical description of the kind of person I’m talking about.  She must be incredibly lonely because she wants so much to tell the most sad and personal things to the poor person behind the counter.  And the really sad thing is, the person behind the counter, usually a woman but not always, is a captive audience.  She’s in the service industry….she makes minimum wage to smile at assholes like this and pretend she gives a shit.  And maybe she does but odds are she has burdens of her own.

So I’m waiting with an impatient baby and the company of my soon to be ex, with whom I feel very uncomfortable.  I just want to order the food and be gone. But I can’t because I have to listen to a litany of medical complaints.  The recent immigrant behind the counter doesn’t care one iota about the middle-aged, blond asshole who is over privileged and doesn’t even recognize that is spending 20 minutes debating with her spoiled teen-aged daughter about the cut of the turkey while simultaneously whining about her life to the deli counter attendant.

I wonder do these kind of people exist everywhere?  In every culture?  Or do these whiny,  sad people with fill-in-the-blank chronic conditions and their associated complaints exist only in America?  Could these conditions be a form of luxury?  Am I an ass for asking that question?  You might think so, until you realize that I have chronic conditions from which I suffer.  I just don’t feel the need to tell perfect strangers about it or waste the time of harried shoppers while I pour out my complaints.  Even on this blog I don’t waste time focusing on that kind of stuff.  I do quite a bit of navel gazing but I don’t open my robe and show the world everything.  And that’s what it feels like to me, to stand there and listen to this woman at the deli counter.  I feel like I’m witnessing some kind of exhibition and it makes me uncomfortable.

It won’ t kill me to wait 10 minutes for what I want.  It will annoy me and not kill me.  I just don’t want to witness a public exhibition of what should be none of anyone’s business.  Please, lady, keep it between you and your therapist next time.